woman in role play nurse's uniform hiding her face with her phone

Naughty Ones Know – Poem

I live being unclothed

Loving the feel of my hair on my back

But live in a world where naked is attacked

My hair brushes and

Shoulder blades

Pats and soothes me there

To take away someone’s’ hair

Is to take away some feeling of care

Our hair keeps us calm

At the end of a twiddler’s arm

Naughty boy, he made me laugh

Naked in the shower

Although the soul is close

The distance is not narrow

The glass could not have been thinner

As he wiggled all about

I thought sausages for dinner.

I wonder what is wrong with me

Lack of a good seeing to, probably

I do miss the tease, the flaunt

I can still worship at the front

But this alone cannot keep a man

Was this part of the plan?

I wish to truss up doctors like chickens

If I can.

Practice on them, as a woman on a man

Chickens that cluck and I won’t give a fuck

If they get caught up in chicken wire

In fact,

I’d send in a Rooster to stir up their desire

Gleefully I’d watch as it’s stops the blood flow

To their special parts

Then they’d know

Ah, I only jest, I think of the dancer

His wiggle, a giggle, one of the best yet

I can think about playthings

Plan scenes

But mesh makes intimacy a fantasy

But my mind still works.


I’m as sexy as can be

I’ve learnt to circumnavigate

My current barren state

I invite them to play with me


Role play is where I’m at

Down there is where you’re sat

A doctor you can be

A beautiful nurse

The woman of your dreams

She will know all that you need

Relax, chill and trust in me

In schemes, I’ll be stuck in your head

You will have me in your bed

But me, true me, remains aloof

Thinking about tea,

Sat here nakedly.


By Samantha “unextraordinarybint” Harris

This was written a few weeks ago, locked down under covid19 conditions.

I’d just been told my surgery for the TVT mesh removal would be postponed again as I have lung disease and they couldn’t possibly risk taking me into hospital. I wonder just how much longer I will be left like this. I make the most of it but cannot help being horny, bitter and a little twisted.

Thank you for reading.


  1. Oh shit, such a monstrously funny, erotic stimulating piece of excellent writing. The only thing I didn’t get was the chickens caught in mesh until I read your piece at the end. Sam, I am so sorry that your op keeps being pushed back but I hope when you do get it that it is not only successful it means you can once again enjoy yourself without any pain. If you like being naked then there is only one place you can do this safely (unfortunately society still objects to people who don’t wear clothes) and that is in the privacy of your own home.
    I particularly loved the way he was naked in the shower and you thought sausages for tea, absolutely inspired. Anyway, my dear, take care and we are heading back into lockdown on Thursday but the cases will continue to rise because the school’s are staying open and they are breeding grounds for this virus.

    • Thank you. I’m proper chuffed that it made you laugh. I have to agree about the schools but if you can get an extension built on your property or have your housing development finished off then why shouldn’t you be able to extend knowledge? My daughter works as a dogged health care nurse assisting vulnerable people in their own homes. In her words, “If I have to wipe twenty people’s butts without full, safe, PPE after hospital discharge with covid19 in one day for less than £10 an hour why shouldn’t my kid is go to school? If it was that dangerous surely they would keep them in hospital or give us proper PPE?” I’m unsure if you’ve read any of my health articles but the one I wrote about the flu vaccine contains links of medical papers proving that the new flu vaccine, introduced 2018/2019, unfortunately does cause our immunity (europeans) to other viruses to decrease. This vaccine has already been given to the children. It’s given out free to under five year olds. They are monitoring and testing, using the children as lab rats,, kind of, not in a harmful way, but you are right, children are super spreaders. I could go on…lol Stay safe.

      • Thank you Sam, and I really feel sorry for those in health care, in March they were only just coping but now there’s no chance of that continuing. Schools should only remain open if the students keep socially distanced and wear face masks around their noses and mouths. Since adults can’t do that I think the schools should close and lessons be done online. After all people are being told to work from home if possible, I had a job monitoring health care systems for Cambridge University Hospitals, to begin with I was away from home in Cambridge but then after 5 weeks I came home and was told that because of the nature of the information I was handling it would be better not to work in the office but to work from home. Needless to say my manager disagreed with that until I pointed out I was accessing patient data and could not risk others overlooking my laptop. That was in 2014-2015. Like you I could go on but won’t, lol, stay safe and don’t take any risks (there’s enough stupid out there taking risks for all the rest of us).